tis period of time had been gloomy for me.
my grandma had passed away last fri.
suddenly alot of thoughts came into my mind
the moment i saw my grandma dead body.
i unknowingly cried.
it had been such a long time since i had cried..
all that came my mind was
how did it happen
jus 2 weeks ago she was laughing and so active
all of the sudden
poof* she is now on her way to the heavens
i regretted alot.
i have not been paying her much visit in the last few years..
only until recently tt i will stay over at my grandma hse on mons
even that,
i din conversemuch wit her cos she will be slpy by the time i reached her hse,
and i will be leaving for sch early in the morning
i wont be hearing her asking me concernly ”你吃饱了吗。？“ and other concerning words that she will definitely ask me when she sees me..
all the nostalgic feelings that i had when i went to her hse after hosp. to prepare for wake.
all my childhood memories.. the bed that my grandma slept on
the place that my cousins and i will play.. all those..
and now. all its left is only a empty room
however, i din cry much durig the wake..
cos i had this theory.. i wan to send my grand ma off cheerfully.. cos she told me once that
my bro and i always make her happy..
tts why i tried not to cry during the rituals. but my tear buds jus dun listen to me.
today i went to collect her ashes..
the once cheerful grandma i had.. now all its left its only bones.
even my father cried when he was driving as we are bringing her ashes to some cemetry
he told me.. he always drive my grandma ard in his taxi eday.. now oso drive her ard.
plus exam is right round the corner.. and things hasnt been gng smoothly for me.
i hope i wont suffer heartbreak after heartbreak.. i rather face it all at once.. so ppl.
got bad news jus tell me.
dun need to worry abt me.. cos i believe im strong enough to face it
cos my name is... TING WEI YANG!! hahas..
a side note:
thanks for the comforting messages that u sent me
i truly felt better knowing that u will stay by me
tis incident taught me alot of things
cherishing ur loved ones is one
i hope u still will let me cherish you. hahas X)
i noe you may not have the mood to study
do work hard
we will strive for good results :D
JIAYOUS!!
if only i can make you smile that sweetly everytime i meet you
your sweet smile never fails to brighten my day.
i swear.
cross my heart
ah ma,
放心走吧。
